


Is it right ?

by seymin



Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Busanbros literal bros, Childhood Friends, Coming Out, Coming of Age, Dowoon is a child, Family Issues, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Jae actual MVP, M/M, Parkbros bff, Slow Burn, Sungjin's a stressball, Sungjin-centric, Wonpil's an awkward mess, Youngfeel bff, Youngk's a sunshine, and a cutie ofc
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:49:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27211489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seymin/pseuds/seymin
Summary: In the middle of an identity crisis, Sungjin goes to his mother's hometown for summer, like every year.But, this summer seems to be different. Between the pressure he indirectly receives from his family, the new encounters, and the return of Kang Younghyun in his life... Everything suddenly accelerates and becomes more and more uncertain.(writing this summary was harder than the whole fic and it sucks, please don't mind it)
Relationships: Kang Younghyun | Young K/Park Sungjin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	1. You're still the same

**Author's Note:**

> Hi ?  
> This is the first work I'm posting here. I'm a little stressed because I spent time on it, hesitated a lot before posting it, kinda like it (even if the plot is really simple) because for once I have inspiration but at the same time I'm not confident in my writing. Sometimes I'm like 'oh, this is great' and some other times I'm like 'wow that's ridiculous, don't post that'. But, hey, I've been writing things (don't know how to call them) for years and this fic is the first chaptered one I'm sure I can finish. Why not post it ?  
> Anyway ! Like many mydays, the lack of Sungjin's content those last few months made me appreciate and miss Sungbri a lot more than I expected. Here is my poor contribution to this great pairing. Bear with it :)

Sungjin loves car rides. Especially in the current conditions. With the people he loves, without the person who distresses him the most, and about to spend a month with the greatest woman in the world. That's why a light smile finds its way on his lips when he looks at his little brother, Dowoon, singing his heart out to a song playing on the radio while his mother is driving, tapping the wheel with her nails at the rhythm of the song. They're on their way to the small town in which she was raised. Their kind and energetic grandmother, Haesook, still lives there and is probably already waiting for them to arrive, impatiently.

Sungjin's stepfather - Dowoon's father - couldn't make it to the trip, too busy with work. And Sungjin couldn't be happier. The simple thought of this man makes him sick, so he refuses to let him ruin his holidays when he's not even a part of it.

A month there will do him good, he knows it. Sure, the Wi-Fi is slower, his grandmother repeats herself a lot because of her age and Dowoon is going to be uncontrollable because of the incredible amount of mosquitoes there, but the overall atmosphere of the town is deeply needed right now.

The calm there is something Sungjin is always longing for. Don't get him wrong, he likes living in Busan, one of the biggest and most dynamic cities of the country, but, as the good introvert he is, he also cherishes to have moments for himself. He needs to recharge his batteries. And a period of a month is perfect for that.

He likes the people living there too. The town is not big enough to forget the faces of every person he bumps into, but not small enough to remember them all. He just happened to meet some very memorable people and knows that everyone is very polite there, even with strangers.

Talking about strangers, everyone there isn't one for Sungjin. There's this woman, Youngmi, his mother's childhood friend. Probably her best friend, by the way. He admires their friendship. They don't see each other often, just when Sungjin's family is in town for holidays, they don't text that much either, but when they call or see each other, it's always the same energy, the same complicity, and the same amount of things to tell the other.

Youngmi has a son the same age as Sungjin, Younghyun. They used to be very close as children, always playing and laughing with one another when Sungjin was in town. Then, life has been some kind of a bitch, and Younghyun and his mother went to Canada for a good four years. Back from this life experience, Younghyun was 15 years old, had apparent puberty, and a new name: Brian. 

As teenagers, they still had a good relationship, never lacking conversation when they saw each other. Younghyun is a pretty talkative and outgoing guy, so he always made it easier for Sungjin. But it never went farther than that. They never bothered taking each other contact information, -well, maybe they're friends on Facebook thanks to their mothers, but is any of them still using it ? You already know the answer- and they were okay with being friends who don't talk very often, seeing each other once a year and waiting until the next one.

Now that he thinks about it, Sungjin doesn't know if he can still consider Younghyun as his friend. It's been two years since they didn't see each other as the latter was traveling with friends the last time Sungjin and his family visited. He does quietly hope to see the guy this year, the presence of another person his age being always more endearing when you don't know many people.

"Look at my babies ! The more time passes, the more beautiful they are" their grandmother greets Sungjin and Dowoon with a bone-crushing hug after they knocked on the door of her old country house.

"Mom..." their mother sighs, approaching them with a cheekysmile "Dowoonie's 6 so --"

"Almost 7 !" Dowoon cuts her off with a pout.

"Dowoonie's almost 7, so he can still be your little baby" she resumes "But Sungjin's 21... Time to let your baby go, he's a grown man now"

"Don't upset me, Yoon Haeson" the old lady warns her daughter jokingly "If I want this handsome man to still be my baby at 40, then he will" she turns her attention to Sungjin and pinches his cheek "Won't you, my baby ?"

He nods sharply "For you ? I will be anything"

This time, it's his mother turn to pout "And you were already refusing to be called my baby at 12... Somebody's got their favorites, I see"

Sungjin and his grandmother roll their eyes simultaneously at the childish behavior of Haeson but their wide grins are impossible to hide. As they enter the cozy house, Sungjin simply feels happy. 

  
  


"How is Byung Hun ?" Sungjin stops chewing on his meat when his grandmother mentions his stepfather's name during their lunch "Still the busy man we love ?"

"Still the same, yes..." Haeson answers while taking a spoon of rice "I know you would have love to see him, but he took his vacations in August, even if he is self-employed..."

There is bitterness in her statement and Sungjin can sense it.

"I can't blame him," Haesook smiles softly "he's an engineer, after all. He knows what he's doing and if he says that he couldn't take them in July, then he has his reasons"

Sungjin rolls his eyes. He doesn't understand the admiration his grandmother has for her son-in-law when he's always avoiding their gatherings. Seven years since Dowoon's birth, and he doubts she saw him more than seven times. He chooses to stay quiet and hope for a quick change of subject.

When it comes, he's suddenly very interested in the conversation.

"Did you inform Youngmi of your coming ?" Haesook asks, not waiting for an answer before continuing "I saw Younghyun at the convenience store two days ago. He helped me to carry my groceries, so I offered him a coffee. What a sweet young man... Too sad I don't have a granddaughter, he would have made a perfect husband..."

Ouch. Here they are, the traditional beliefs of his grandmother Sungjin dreads so much. The perfect young man for a sweet young woman, nothing easier. He loves his grandmother from the bottom of his heart, but this kind of simple remarks frightens him. It frightens him because he doesn't know how they're going to react.

How are they going to react when he is going to let them know that this perfect scheme of the perfect family they idealize so much will never apply to him ?

Sungjin is gay and that's a fact. He made it official to himself -and to his best friend, Park Jaehyung, the wisest, most tolerant, and caring person you will ever meet. Big up to you, Jae- a year ago after the best night he ever had with a girl which strangely felt so wrong. Everything is clear for him now, but he's afraid. Afraid of his family. He wishes he wasn't, but let's be realistic ; even in 2020, South Korea still isn't such an open-minded country. He does have hope for the people he loves the most to not care because they love him more than the idea of him marrying a beautiful woman, but his fear is only legitimate.

"Anyway, here I am, rambling again" lost in his thoughts, he hadn't noticed that his grandmother was still talking, telling them all the details about her little encounter with Younghyun "What I wanted to say is that he was surprised when I told him you were coming to town, so I'm wondering if you at least told his mother about it"

"Of course I told her we were coming !" Haeson rushes to confirm "I should call her by the way, I hope we can see them really soon"

And she does so, right after their lunch. Between loud chatters and laughter coming from her conversation with her friend, Sungjin seems to understand that they're going to see the Kang’s the next day. Knowing that Younghyun is in town, he can't help but be excited at the thought of seeing him again after two years.

* * *

Well, Sungjin may have cried victory too early. Younghyun being in town doesn't mean he has to be home when they visit his mother the next day.

After Youngmi's usual praising about how adorable Dowoon's gotten and how handsome Sungjin is, he dares to ask her about his childhood friend.

"Ah yeah, sorry about that..." Youngmi says sheepishly "As I invited you at the last minute, I didn't have time to warn him not to plan anything, he already had plans with some friends. He won't eat with us, but he did promise me to come home as soon as he can to greet you all. After all, it's been such a long time. I guess you really wanted to see your old friend, Sungjinie..."

Sungjin smiles softly "Oh, don't worry, even if he comes back when we're gone, we're here for a month. We will have time to see each other"

Youngmi snorts "You don't even know how right you are. He was so eager to see you he almost canceled his plans for today. But when he realized that you were here for a month, he suddenly wanted to give you a whole tour of the town ! As if you weren't coming here almost every summer since your birth... I guess he really missed you" Sungjin raises a brow at that. Younghyun did ? "Anyway, I'm talking too much... Why don't we sit down at the table and talk about everything while eating ?"

Youngmi leads them to the same old table she has ever since Sungjin can remember, and they settle down at it, waiting for the woman to bring the food.

Knowing that she's a cook, Dowoon is fidgeting on his seat. "Hyung..." he murmurs in Sungjin's ear "I smell bulgogi... Do you think auntie cooked bulgogi ?"

At that exact moment, Youngmi is coming back to the dining room with the dish Dowoon just guessed. Sungjin high-fives his little brother "Great sense of smell, champion" he pinches his cheek "Now stop wriggling and be the polite boy that mommy taught you to be"

At these words, Dowoon suddenly straightens up and, with a bow of his head, exclaims "Thank you for the meal, auntie !"

Youngmi smiles fondly at the boy and allows them to start eating "I see that you're expressing yourself way better than before, Woonie... What grade are you in, again ?" she asks.

"I'm gonna pass in second grade !" Dowoon answers proudly "I learned how to read and write. I can also count until 63 !"

"63 ? That's such a curious number to stop at but I'm proud of you, baby. You're doing great"

Dowoon only nods at that, his cheeks already full of food. Youngmi continues, her attention now on Sungjin "And you, Sungjin ? You're still in Busan Art College ? Majoring in music, right ?"

"Yes, auntie" he confirms "I just finished my first year"

"That's wonderful, my dear !" They all shoot a confused look at Youngmi's sudden excitement. She seems to have an inner debate before continuing "Okay, I shouldn't be the one to announce you this but I'm so excited, and he's not here so... I'm gonna tell you myself ! Younghyun is going to enter the same university as you !"

Suddenly ? What news, Sungjin thinks to himself.

"Is he ?!" Haeson exclaims, surprised "How come ? To do what ? Do you know that Busan Art College actually is in Busan ? How is he going to go there every morning ? Don't tell me... Are you going to settle down in Busan ?"

Youngmi laughs at the question chain of her best friend "He applied for music major and was taken, as simple as that. Yeah, we know that it's in Busan but it's the most prestigious school in which he was accepted, might as well take advantage of it. And no, no settlement in Busan, at least for me. His best friend was also accepted there. They searched for an apartment together and found one. They're gonna spend a week there next months to install everything"

Rather than the grin Sungjin expected to see on his mother's lips, he can distinguish a concerned look on her face "You're letting him go ? Are you sure of yourself ? You're alone if you let him go, Youngmi. You don't have anyone to look after you"

Surprisingly, Youngmi answer is a cheerful laugh "Haeson, I'm a single mother, not a senile old woman. I have friends here, you're not the only one. Okay, my son is my everything but... I love him and want the best for him. He knows for a while what he wants to do and I promised to be by his side every step of the way. That's what I'm doing by letting him go there"

Oh, how Sungjin loves this woman. Her son is the most precious for her, but she does things for him while considering his happiness rather than what would be the "safest" situation.

Haeson nods understandably at that "I see... I'm happy for him but I can be worried about you, right ? How is he going to pay the rent ? Are you gonna do it for him ? If so, we can help--"

"He had a job !" Youngmi cuts her mid-sentence, not wanting to hear more of her nonsense "He found one during the school year at a local shop and saved a lot. He's gonna search for a job once in Busan too, do not worry about that. He's responsible"

They continue to talk about it for a while and then the subject change to more trivial stuff. While his grandmother is complaining to Youngmi about her hairdresser changing to a new one without notice and how the new one completely messed up the color of her dye -anecdote she already told her family three times since their arrival by the way-, Sungjin's mind still is on the Younghyun's news.

He'd never thought that this kind of announcement would bring him so much excitement, but it did. Knowing that his good old friend has chances to become a more important part of his life is kind of endearing. He doesn't know if they're gonna stick together since the other guy is way less socially constipated (and, moreover, he's bringing his best friend with him) than him, but they're not gonna ignore each other, that is for sure.

The lunch eventually comes to an end and while Dowoon and Haesook are sited on the couch, watching the TV, the child explaining to his attentive grandmother the role of each character of his favorite cartoon, the two best friends are catching up at the kitchen's table. Coming out of the bathroom, Sungjin decides to join the two women. He takes a seat near them and serves himself a glass of juice.

"And this..." he hears his mother says as she shows her friend her phone "is our last trip to the United States, last Christmas. You'd never know it, but California's just as nice in winter.

"This guy is Jae, Sungjin's best friend, he's American, so he came with us. Felt good to have a guide" she adds when she finds a picture of Dowoon building a snowman with the help of his brother and Jae.

"He's a cute lanky guy" Youngmi takes the phone and zooms on the blond guy before scrolling through all the photos "All those trips are great, you all look so happy and I know you can mainly afford them because of him but... Why isn't your husband ever on them with you ? Don't wanna sound rude but... This Jae guy looks more like a member of Dowoon's family in those ten pictures than Byung Hun has ever been in 7 years"

Sungjin chokes on his drink hearing the brutal honestly of Youngmi. He agrees, of course, but he never would have said it that way.

His mother plays nervously with her fingers "It's... It's not like that. I mean, I get what you mean and it's true that with him, it's always about excuses and stuff but... he's here for his son"

"Financially" Youngmi declares curtly. "When it comes to money he sure is here for your son but is he emotional support for any of you ? I just have to look at Sungjin’s face right now to see that it didn't evolve since the last time. Since the first time, actually"

Sunjin listens to the exchange silently and his heart tightens when he sees that his mother is looking at her hands, having no answer to that. She knows her friend is right.

Youngmi bites her lips sheepishly and shakes her friend's hand a little "Hey, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up. But you know how I feel about the situation. And you know that I'm here if you ever need to talk..." Haeson stays silent but nods at her words "Anyway ! It's my turn to show you some pictures"

Younmi takes her own phone and shows them pictures of Younghyun and her to change the subject. Sungjin sees that the guy hasn't changed much in two years, but with the self-consciousness of his sexuality, he is now able to recognize how handsome he is. Well, maybe cute is a more appropriate word ? How come the guy became cuter with age ? 

Yougmi tells them about the little passion her son has for traveling and that he is planning to take her to a secret destination at the end of the following month, before going to Busan for good. How sweet of Kang Younghyun. She adds that he's always willing to travel on a whim either with her, his friends, or alone.

"He travels alone ?" Haeson asks with a smirk "Are you sure of that ? Isn't there a girl behind all this ?"

Youngmi scoffs "I'm sure of it, believe me. Well, maybe there is a certain someone but that's surely isn't a girl"

Sungjin's head perks up at that.

"Younghyun came out last year. He's gay" Youngmi stresses when she doesn't receive any answers from her friend.

"Oh. Is... Is he ?" Haeson stutters, not knowing what to say "And... How did you react ?"

"How do you want me to react ?" Youngmi frowns, certainly not expecting this kind of reaction "Can I do something against it ? He was never attracted to a girl once in his life. He knows it since he's 15 apparently and was afraid of telling me. Even if I could do something, I wouldn't. All I want is his happiness. I've lost enough people to let the most important one run away from me because of his sexuality"

If there's one thing Sungjin wasn't expecting this morning while coming to the Kang's house, it's definitely that. First, Younghyun is going to study music at his university, and second, he's gay. Well, they have more in common than he thought.

And Yougmi ? She's so chill about it. Not that she shouldn't be, but still. How he wishes his family would react the same.

His mother seems to come out of her state of shock and says "Yeah, you're right. I'm sorry. That's just... unexpected"

"It is, probably. But you have no problems with it, right ?" Youngmi’s tone is more serious than before and Sungjin realizes that the question is not only directed to his mother.

"Of course not !" he's the first to react, his answer maybe too rushed to not hide anything "I... I mean, he's still Younghyun. Doesn't matter who he's attracted to, he's my friend"

Youngmi looks at him with soft eyes and a warm smile, nodding to him as if to say "thank you" and turns her head to his mother.

"Of course I don't have any problem with it, Youngmi" Sungjin can sense the hesitation and nervousness in his mother's voice and it's enough for him to feel sick "But..." she lowers her voice, "I think you shouldn't tell my mother yet. I don't really know about her reaction"

Oh. He's now feeling even sicker. Youngmi doesn't seem so pleased about this statement either, but she chooses to just nod absentmindedly "Don't worry, I won't. I shouldn't be the one to tell you that in the first place but the subject was brought up so..."

Their conversation gets cut off by Dowoon's excited voice coming from the dining room "BriBri !!!" 

A more mature voice as excited as his can be heard next "Dowoonie ! Oh my god, you've gotten cuter than before, how is that even possible ?!"

Oh. Younghyun is home.

The two women and Sungjin walk into the dining room to find Dowoon giggling in Younghyun's arms, the latter trying to politely greet Haesook despite the little boy hanging on his neck. Sungjin notices that another boy is shyly standing in the door frame, probably waiting for the little reunion to be over to introduce himself.

Youngmi coughs to make her son notice their presence. When he turns his head towards them, a big grin appears on his face "Auntie ! Sungjin-Hyung !" he looks at the little guy in his arms and asks "Woonie, would you mind coming down, so I can say hello to your mother and brother ?"

It's not without a little pout that the little koala comes down his tree and Younghyun goes to Sungjin and his mother, hugging her while she compliments him and his handsome face.

When their hug is over, the younger looks at Sungjin with hesitation "Do you mind if I hug you Mr. Littletonoskinship ?"

Sungjin is taken aback by the question but manages to nonchalantly shrug as if he was totally comfortable with the situation "Of course, Kang Bra"

Surprising himself and everyone else, he's the one initiating the contact, taking the other boy closer, awkwardly patting his back while sensing Younghyun's warm breath on his shoulder. The younger guy is surprised but pleased by the gesture as he returns it, although in a less awkward way.

When they break apart, Younghyun is grinning at him "It's been such a long time"

"And whose fault is that ?" Sungjin asks, a teasing smile on his lips.

The younger bows his head ironically "May you forgive me, Sir"

Both of them share a laugh and Sungjin almost forgets about the people surrounding them. Younghyun doesn't. "Oh, right ! You've never met Wonpil, right ?" he asks while pointing to the guy whose patiently waiting in the doorway avoiding the gaze of a curious Dowoon at his feet "And he's not going to do it himself, I see. Please meet Wonpil, my best friend. Pil, meet Sungjin, Haeson, and the cutie you seem to be so afraid of, Dowoon. You already know a lot about them"

Does he ? Younghyun's best friend knows a lot about them ? Sungjin's okay with that. It's kind of flattering.

"Yes I do..." the stranger -no, Wonpil- says shyly before politely introducing himself "It's really nice to meet you all"

After that they all quickly introduced themselves to Wonpil, Younghyun turns to Sungjin "Wanna come with us ?"

"Where to ?" he raises an eyebrow curiously.

"Oh, not far. Just my room" Younghyun shrugs "Just thought that staying with people your age would be better than watching Paw Patrol or listening to the discussions of two 50-somethings women who haven't seen each other in a year"

Youngmi shoves her son lightly "The 50-somethings women are still here so watch your mouth"

"Oops. My bad" Younghyun says innocently and then look at Sungjin "Let's go ?"

Sungjin only nods and follows the two boys to Younghyun's room.

  
  


Once in it, everything surprisingly goes very well, Younghyun helping the two introverts to get to know each other. Sungjin then learns that Wonpil is a shy boy who is the same age as Younghyun. They're in the same class since the beginning of high school, and they forged a link quickly because they were in the same optional music class. They're now inseparable and Sungjin can see that they like each other very much.

"And just at the moment we were about to get off the dais, this stupid guy fucking fe-- Yah !” As Younghyun is in the middle of telling Sungjin a story about Wonpil's clumsiness in front of their class during a presentation, the latter just put his hand on his mouth to keep him quiet.

Suddenly, Wonpil's hand is off his best friend's mouth and a disgusted expression is on his face "Fucking hell, Younghyun ! Did you just lick my hand ?!!"

Younghyun, with an amused smile, nods, licking his lips "Your palm is salty"

"Ew" Wonpil says before wiping his hand full of Younghyun's saliva on the latter's cheek.

Apparently, he takes that as a declaration of war and, forgetting about Sungjin presence, shoves a pillow onto Wonpil's face. Sungjin watches them bicker for a moment, not saying anything because they're cute, beginning to wonder about their relationship.

Younghyun seems to eventually remember that they're not alone in the room and looks at Sungjin. Moving a hand in front of his eyes, he calls "Hyung ? Sungjin-hyung ? You're still here ?"

"Huh ?" Sungjin shakes his head, trying to go back to reality "No... I mean, yes. I'm still here. I was just wondering... Uhm... Are you guys together ?"

What the hell is this question ? He regrets asking it almost instantly, realizing that he's still a little lost in his thoughts that he asked what he would normally not dare to. He's clearly meddling and he shouldn't.

As he's about to excuse himself for the indiscretion, the two best friends in front of him burst into laughter.

"Hell no !" they say in unison and Younghyun continues "I mean, we were, at a point, something more than just friends -I refuse to call it boyfriends- because we were like "Oh you're gay, I'm gay, we're getting along so well so let's try something !" But, warning ! Worst idea, don't reproduce it at home. It was the most awkward and ridiculous experience we ever had. We're better off as besties, believe me"

Sungjin looks at them understandably, noting that he finally found not only one but two guys with the same sexual orientation as him in one day -there are no small victories-, but he's still uncomfortable with his question "Oh... Okay, I see. I shouldn't have asked, I'm sorry"

"No problem, really" Wonpil smiles at him "I get that people can be a little curious about our relationship but... nothing more than friendship, really"

"Yup ! We're just very close, that's all" Younghyun agrees "But... Hyung. This question. Were you just assuming I'm gay or did my mother once again did my coming out for me to people ?"

Sungjin purses his lips sheepishly "Uh… The second option"

Younghyun rolls his eyes "Aah... my dear mother... I'm assuming she also told you about our acceptance in Busan Art of College ?"

"Uh… Yes," Sungjin admits once again. “But, by the way, that’s great ! You’ll do what you were always dreaming of. And... I'm gonna be in my second year there so you could use me as a guide... Only if you need it of course"

"More than a guide, I would like to use you as a friend if it's not too much to ask, hyung" Younghyun says, a serious look on his face "Seriously we've never seen each other for a long time, but we always considered each other as friends, right ? Well, that was the case for me. Now that we have a great occasion to maintain this friendship, I don’t want to let it go"

Oh. Here we go. Sungjin's touched. Younghyun still considers him as a friend.

"Of course, Kang Bra. I won't let it go too, we're gonna have a lot of fun" he decides to play it cool and continues by asking them questions "You're coming to Busan next month to settle in, is it ?"

"Yes ! We're gonna install the first pieces of furniture before coming back definitely in September"

Sungjin nods and thinks about whether he should offer what he thought he should since Youngmi had told them the news earlier. He decides to do it "If the apartment's too messy during the installation, you know that we have a spare room. My mother won't mind if you wanna spend some nights there"

"Is your stepfather still the same Yoon Byung Hun ?" Younghyun asks as an answer, surprising Sungjin.

"Uhm... Yes ?" He answers, unsure for a reason he ignores.

"Then thanks for the offer, but our beds will be delivered as soon as we arrive. We should manage" Younghyun declares curtly.

"But, Bri…" Wonpil pouts "It's a great offer, it would be more comfortable to not sleep in the mess that'll be the apartment during the installation"

Younghyun shakes his head firmly "Believe me Pil, if you have some dignity and if you're so proud of who you are, you mustn't go near that man. No offense Sungjin-hyung, of course"

"I'm never offended when it comes to this man," he says matter-of-factly.

And he really isn't. He hates everything about this man. He hates that his mother married him and pretends to be happy by his side. Hates that this man is the father of the person he cherishes the most. Hates that he's the person who gives him the comfort he's living in. And he fucking hates the reaction Younghyun just had because it’s just confirming his biggest fears.

The thing is, even knowing that most of the people surrounding them are not fond of his stepfather as well, he didn't expect Younghyun to be this harsh on someone he rarely saw in his life. Or on anyone, actually. With just that, he knows that there is more to the story than just an "I don't like him because you told me that he's a mean person". The reason is in his sexuality, he’s sure of it.

Even so, he chooses not to go further in the sensitive subject and tries to think about a change of subject. Younghyun beats him to it "How is your father, hyung ?"

"Still the same loving clown you used to know" Sungjin shrugs, getting up to walk around the room and observe his friend's things, as he dared to do very comfortably in the past.

"Is he ?" Younghyun asks, excited. "It's been such a long time since I last saw him, I kinda miss him"

"You're probably gonna see him in Busan. He would be happy to see you too" Sungjin's voice is soft before becoming more stern "But remember that if you didn't see this clown for this long, there is a reason. He's still an asshole"

Wonpil eyes widen as he's silently listening to their conversation, not understanding how someone can talk so fondly of their father before insulting him.

“Yeah right, sorry. I just can't imagine him doing what he did, but well... he did" Younghyun bites his lips sheepishly" Seeing where Sungjin is glancing, he decides to change the subject "Wanna play ?"

Hanging on the wall are two guitars, including one that Sungjin can’t seem to forget. He was only 5 when he heard someone play it for the first time. He’s been dreaming of music ever since. He knows it’s the same for Younghyun.

“Why not ?” he says, tempted by the idea “It’s been really long let’s play together, Kang Bra”

“Great idea ! Wonpil, play with us” Younghyun grins, super excited, before opening his room’s door “Wait for me, I'm going to get my bass and my mini keyboard for Pil. Hyung, you can take dad’s guitar, I’ll not play it”

“Huh ? Are you sure, Younghyun ?” Sungjin questions, uncertain.

Younghyun chuckles “I’m sure, Hyung. You’ve been eyeing for minutes. It’s made to be used, not for decoration. Use it”

And, just like that, ten minutes later, the three of them are playing some random songs together, Sungin discovering Wonpil’s original and smooth voice while rediscovering Younghyun’s versatile one. The room slowly turns into a mini-concert hall, his family and Yougmi joining to watch them. As they’re playing an odd version of a popular K-pop song those days with Dowoon jamming on it, using a footstool as some sort of drum, Sungjin thinks about Jae. He can’t wait to play with those three (four, let's not forget the budding drummer) guys once Younghyun and Wonpil come to Busan.

Playing with them feels so good, so right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo... This is it.  
> I have some chapters already written but I have to read them again before posting. I already have pretty much the whole plot in my head even if the chapters are not written so the updates should be quite regular, unless the laziness and hate of my own writings take possession of my body again.  
> Anyway ! What did you think of this first chapter ? Don't hesitate to left comments and kudos if you liked it !


	2. You only need to relieve your heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the second chapter ! It's made of parallels between present and past (italics).  
> This chapter was ready for days but I hesitated a long time because of the last scene. I love angst so I like to include at least a bit of it everywhere but I don't know if I'm actually good at writing it. I cringed reading it not because it's (that) bad but more because it's not original at all... But anyway, here it is, I hope you enjoy this chapter !

"Two gays in one day ?!" Jae's voice is loud through the phone as Sungjin just finished telling him about his day at the Kang's house "Woah, man… You hit the jackpot"

As he sits at the foot of a tree in his grandmother's garden, Sungjin rolls his eyes even if he's best friend can't see it "Stop saying that as if they were some sort of prizes that I won"

"Aren't they ?" Jae says and Sungjin can hear the smirk in his voice.

"Jae !" Sungjin cheeks flush as he raises his voice, but instantly lowers it, not wanting his family to hear him from inside the house "Are you implying that I'm necessarily going to try something with one of them under the pretext that we have the same sexual orientation ? It's such a stereotypical way of thinking, I didn't think that about you..."

"Didn't you say that it was exactly what Younghyun and this Wonpil guy did ?" Jae asks and Sungjin doesn't know what to say because, well, he's right. "No, but seriously," he adds "I'm not saying with a stereotypical way of thinking, man, I was joking. I'm just happy because you now have someone to relate to, to rely on. I'm not saying that you couldn't do it with me but those guys went through the thing you fear the most"

"And so what ?" Sungjin deadpans, knowing exactly what Jae's about to tell him. He can almost hear Jae face palms through the line.

"And so you should tell them ! Or at least, tell Younghyun. Seriously, you know him for years and you just learned that he went through the same hardship as you. He could give you advice or just share his experience with you. One thing is for sure, he won't judge you, so please do something.”

Sungjin gulps, reaching for a fallen leaf on the ground and playing with it. Jae's right, as usual. "I'm gonna think about it. It may take some time but I'll try telling him"

"Good" Jae's satisfied voice says before becoming more serious "You know that I'm saying that because I want you to be happy, right ? I want to see you glowing and comfortable with yourself, Sungjin. That's all"

Sungjin needs to hang up before he chokes on tears because of Jae's words. He's not gonna allow him the privilege to hear that. And for the blond to bug him for the rest of their lives ? No thanks.

"I know, Jae. Thank you" he sincerely answers. "Now go back to screaming against some bots in your video game, you did enough therapy for the day"

"Gonna do that. Enjoy your holidays. Hit me up if you decide to tell Younghyun anything"

"I will. See you" 

* * *

This time, after seeing each other for the first time in two years, Younghyun and Sungjin finally decided to exchange numbers. Not even a week into their vacation, as Sungjin is coming back from the market with his grandmother, he's surprised by a text he wasn't expecting so soon. He smiles when he reads it.

**▪︎Kang Bra▪︎**

**[09:54 am]**

Hyuuuung !!! Busy tomorrow ?

**▪︎Me▪︎**

**[10:46 am]**

No. Not doing anything. Why ?

**▪︎Kang Bra▪︎**

**[10:50 am]**

Casual shopping, lunch, town's tour, and ice cream day with Wonpil. Wanna come ?

So, Younghyun wasn't lying when he said that he wanted to spend more time with him. He's even inviting him to his casual dat... day with Wonpil. Guess the latter appreciated him as much as he did when they met.

**▪︎Me▪︎**

**[10:52 am]**

Why not ? Could be nice.

He's playing it way too cool for someone who can't stop smiling just because he was invited to spend a day with two friends (is he Wonpil friend, though ? _'Shut the fuck up with that overthinking mind of yours'_ he could hear Jae says if he was with him)

**▪︎Kang Bra▪︎**

**[10:54 am]**

Cool ! In front of my house at 11:30 am ?

Good for you ?

**▪︎Me▪︎**

**[10:55 am]**

Good for me

**▪︎Kang Bra▪︎**

**[10:56 am]**

Great, see you there !

**▪︎Me▪︎**

**[10:58 am]**

See you :) 

* * *

Sungjin is there a little earlier than 11:30. Well, ten minutes ahead of time, actually. Better too early than too late, his mother taught him. Still, Younghyun may not be ready yet, so he chooses to wait a little on the sidewalk in front of the younger house before sending him a text.

A new familiar voice still surprises him as he’s waiting “Sungin… hyung ?” the voice hesitantly asks and Sungjin turns his head at the mention of his name. Oh. Wonpil apparently has the same mother as him. The younger smiles when their eyes meet “It’s you. How are you, hyung ?”

“Oh. Hi, Wonpil. I’m fine and you ?” Sungjin returns the question with a polite smile.

“I’m doing good” Wonpil answers before they fall into a short awkward silence “Did you tell Younghyun you were here ?”

Obviously, he had to meet him and make a fool of himself for not sending a freaking text to their friend. “Guess I forgot. Silly me” he fakes a chuckle before taking his phone out of his pocket and sending a quick “We’re here” to Younghyun. He looks at Wonpil with a small smile and says “Done”

Wonpil's answer is a simple nod and they fall again in this freaking awkward silence. Oh, how things were easier when the ever so extroverted Younghyun was with them.

Talking about him, what is he doing ?! It’s been already… uh, just one minute since he sent him the text. He even received a “Putting my shoes on” with a smiley face as an answer. But still, can’t he be quicker ? This moment is getting more and more embarrassing as seconds pass.

Apparently, he’s not the only one finding the situation uncomfortable because Wonpil tries to break the ice shyly “Uhm… Hyung ?”

“Yes ?”

“You know, It’s really great to meet you.”

Suddenly ? Sungjin is not good at receiving compliments in general, let alone when they are so sudden. A little warning would have been nice.

“Uh… The feeling is shared” he says, because, well, it’s true.

When they met, he could sense how kindhearted Wonpil is and how happy Younghyun seems by his side. It’s enough to know that Wonpil is a good guy.

“I mean,” Wonpil resumes when Sungjin thought their little compliments session was over “I’m really happy to meet you after all these years hearing about you”

Okay, where is this conversation leading them ? Sungjin raises an eyebrow, inciting the other to continue.

“Just saying, Younghyun is really fond of you and the memories you shared together. You probably didn’t know about me until a week ago, but I actually know about you since I met him”

“Really ?” Sungjin asks, not quite believing what he just heard.

“And so what ?” Younghyun intrudes on their conversation, making his best friend jump “Are you jealous, Kim Wonpil ? Or do you just want Sungjin to believe I’m obsessed with him ?”

“Uh… both ?” Wonpil wriggles his eyebrows and gets a slap on the back by Younghyun who decides to ignore him and directs his attention to Sungjin.

“How are you doing, hyung ?”

“I’m doing great but, Younghyun...” With the change in the atmosphere which became lighter since Younghyun’s arrival, Sungjin suddenly feels bold enough to annoy him a little “Is it true ? Do you talk a lot about me ?”

If Sungjin seems to notice a flush of red on Younghyun’s cheeks, it disappears as soon as it appeared “Well, I guess I really missed you.” he simply shrugs, turning his back on a flustered Sungjin “I’m disappointed, hyung. I was low key expecting that Jae also heard a lot about me. Are we going ?”

And they do exactly that, Sungjin following them while thinking _'Oh, don’t you worry... Jae heard a lot about you too'_

* * *

“What the hell, you two…” Wonpil says when their orders are on the table of the little restaurant they choose to eat at. The table is full of food and not even a quarter is Wonpil’s “Eating with Younghyun alone was already an embarrassing mess but… Sungjin-hyung, not you too”

“Sorry Wonpil, but if there's one situation in which I'm not embarrassed, it's eating.” Sungjin says, eyeing Younghyun plate(s) then Younghyun himself with challenge “I see you’re still a big eater. Are you sure you’re gonna finish everything ?”

“What ?” Younghyun raises an eyebrow with a smirk “Is it because I ordered three more servings than you ? Afraid you’re not the biggest eater at this table ?”

Sungjin laughs scornfully, taking the first bowl of noodle soup in his hand “You’ll see”

They both start to eat in silence, defiance in their eyes.

Wonpil frowns with a look full of judgment, “Are you really competing over food ?”

Well, obviously they are and he gets the confirmation at the end of their meal when Younghyun is eating his third last servings and Sungjin is asking Wonpil for his last ones that he doesn’t seem to want. Looking at each other, they conclude there is a draw between them and shake each other hand with humility. Wonpil wonders what is holding him back. He could leave at any moment, these two are perfectly fine on their own. 

The afternoon is going well. Very well.

Despite knowing Younghyun his whole life, Sungjin still feared a little to be in the way of the two best friends, to bother them - which is dumb because it’s Younghyun who asked him to accompany them -, but not at all.

They went to a small shopping mall - which is actually the biggest in the town - and did some window shopping. They all bought at least a futility and Wonpil fell for a pair of sneakers. Nothing crazy but a chill afternoon with friends. Wow, he admitted it ; Younghyun and Wonpil are his friends.

Uh… Not friends for a long time if they’re really going to end the day like that. As they are passing by an ice cream shop to reach the exit of the shopping mall, Sungjin stops on his way, looking at the two boys with furrowed eyebrows.

“Is there a problem, hyung ?” Younghyun asks with confusion.

“I thought we agreed on ice cream,” Sungjin says, almost sulking.

Younghyun would have found it hilarious if it didn’t come from him. But, we’re talking about Park Sungjin there, and he’s almost pouting. This is a little creepy coming from this man. 

It’s Wonpil who decides to answer him with a laugh “The ice cream parlor we go to is actually outside the shopping mall. Don’t worry hyung, you’ll get your ice cream”

Sungjin’s frown disappears to give way to a satisfying expression “Okay. Let’s go then” he says, going ahead without really knowing where.

The two best friends follow him, Wonpil whispering to Younghyun “Didn’t expect this serious guy to be such a child. He was almost cute”

“Told you,” Younghyun shrugs, a fond smile on the lips “Nobody wants to recognize what I’ve been thinking for years now. I’m glad you agree, though” 

Once in the ice cream parlor, Younghyun insists to pay for the three of them and Sungjin isn’t hard to convince. When the younger joins him and Wonpil after paying, Sungjin eyes his ice cream with judgment.

“Shooting star, huh ?” he asks with a smirk “You never grew up, did you ?”

“I’ve stopped growing up the day I wasted a whole ice cream to help YOU, Mr. Park. Just to be scolded as thanks” Younghyun says as he reaches for a paper napkin, at the opposite side of the table, bitterness perceptible in his voice.

Sungjin instantly reacts to this “It was a childhood trauma for me too ! My knee was refrigerated and the perfume of stupid shooting star smelled even in my socks !”

Confusion is written all over Wonpil face when he sees them suddenly argue for something he ignores. Until he tilts and bursts out of his hysterical laughter. Younghyun told him this story before.

* * *

_“Thanks a lot, Mister, have a good-- Younghyun for god’s sake ! Can’t you wait ?!” Youngmi gets angry at her five years old son who’s tugging at the hem of her pants while she’s thanking the ice cream guy after buying one for Younghyun. “I’m sorry, Mister. Have a good day”_

_She sighs and gives his shooting star ice cream to her eager son who runs in the direction of Sungjin and his mother who are already outside the shop._

_“Sungjinie !” Younghyun grins, holding his ice cream out to his friend after taking a bite of it “This is delicious, want to taste it ?”_

_Sungjin glares at the younger's ice cream, eyes full of judgment, and shakes his head “I don’t want a taste of this disgusting blue mess !”_

_Seeing Younghyun’s eyes widen and a pout taking place on his face, Haeson is quick to react “Sungjin ! Don’t use words like that, you know I don’t like that. And Younghyun was just being nice, why do you have to be this mean ?”_

_It’s Sungjjin’s turn to pout “I wasn’t being mean ! Shooting star is not good !”_

_“We don't say ‘it's not good’ but 'I don't like it," Younghyun says matter-of-factly, licking his ice cream before continuing “You bad-mannered child”_

_Youngmi gasps at her son’s words “Younghyun ! You are being the bad-mannered child here ! Apology to your friend. Right now”_

_Younghyun sulks but he still comes closer to his friend who looks away and turns his back to him, clearly offended. Sungjin walks away without knowing where to and Haeson sighs._

_“I can’t believe my six years old son is already going through some teenage angst” She shakes her head and looks fondly at Younghyun who is close to tears. “Don’t worry Hyunie, he’s gonna stop his tantrum in no time”_

_Younghyun nods weakly and they follow the little silhouette of Sungjin who shuffles his feet angrily, determined to go somewhere, but nobody knows where. Their mothers are finding it funny until this way of walking makes the child -and his ice cream- fall to the ground and cry his eyes out._

_Haeson runs hurriedly to her son and gently cups his face with her hands, a sigh of relief leaving her mouth when she sees that he’s not hurt there, “Are you hurt baby ? Please tell mommy where”_

_“I-I… My knee hurts so much, m-mommy” Sungjin sobs while pointing at his right knee. Haeson carefully lifts his pants above his knee and bites her lips when she sees a scratch on it. Nothing serious, but enough to hurt a 6-year-old child and make him think that he will never again be able to play any leg sports in his life._

_As she is about to take Sungjin in her arms, Younghyun steps in, looking at Haeson as if he is a mini Superman “I know what to do, auntie”_

_The two women look curiously at the boy and Sungjin can’t care more because he’s too busy ugly crying in the background._

_Younghyun looks at him and continues “Don’t worry, hyung, it’ll be alright !”_

_And, with no time to lose, he suddenly puts his whole ice cream upside down on his friend’s knee. Friend who screams in pain at the contact, by the way._

_Youngmi, shocked by her son’s act, has no time to gently scold him anymore. She decides to yell at him “Kang Younghyun ! That’s enough ! Are you crazy ?! Why did you do that to Sungjin ?”_

_Scared by his mother's tone, Younghyun’s lips are trembling “Da-Daddy told me that putting ice on a wound relieves the pain… I thought it would help, I-I’m sorry…”_

_Younghyun seems genuinely sad and that shut the two women - including Haeson who’s wiping the now blue wound of her son with a napkin – up. The situation is actually kind of cute._

_Sungjin, on the other hand, cries harder which only makes Younghyun burst into tears as well. Well, the walk and ice cream afternoon did not go as planned in the end. No more ice cream for each of the two crying children and an impossible walk with a injured boy._

* * *

After that day, everything is back to the way it was on the first days between Sungjin and Younghyun.

In no time, they found again the strong friendship made of subtle random compliments from the younger, frustrated sassy remarks from the older and sweet bickering they had when they were children. It’s a shame, Younghyun had to say one day, that they didn’t maintain this friendship all the time they were far from each other. Sungjin had to agree. But, hey, what’s done is done and the most important thing is the present time. And, right now, they have the biggest opportunity to reinforce this relationship. Again, these words come from Younghyun. Ah, the ever-so-optimistic Kang Younghyun…

But still, he was right and they are doing their best at it.

The proof is, they’re currently playing cat and mouse with Dowoon at the National Park of the town. Today, there is no Wonpil with them but both their mothers, Sungjin’s grandmother and, obviously, Dowoon. This park probably is the place the two young men spent the most time with their families as children. That’s why they want Dowoon to have a lot of fun there as well.

“Caught you !” Younghyun shouts a cry of victory as he catches Dowoon during what – Sungjin thinks- is their tenth part of the day “Your turn”

But, Dowoon isn’t as excited as he was during the nine other games and shakes his head “No. Don’t wanna play anymore” And, just like that, he turns his back to the two men and goes to sit with the three women.

Sungjin holds back a laugh when he sees Younghyun offended expression “What ?” he asks playfully “You wanted to play more, is it, Kang Bra ?”

“I…” Younghyun blinks, mouth agape “I don’t remember this child being so brutally honest and rude in his own way. He sure grew up a lot”

They join their families and Younghyun seems to decide to sulk at Dowoon to make him react.

Sungjin watches them with despair. Who is the seven years old kid here ? In this instance, the actual kid seems to not care about the pout on Younghyun’s face as he puts himself on Sungjin's lap and watches Younghyun with the most adorable expression. “Bribri…” he makes eyes at the men “Please play”

Sungjin swears he can see Younghyun melt in front of the little boy who he was going to pout at. But then, he sees confusion written all over his face and sighs. He nods toward the guitar Younghyun himself brought with him and it tilts.

“Oh, of course, Dowoonie, what do you want me to play ?"

“Don’t care… Just wanna hear you sing” the kid mumbles as he settles himself better onto his brother's lap. He seems sleepy.

“Okay…” Younghyun smiles “Gonna do that. Hyung, you’re with me ?”

“Huh ?” Sungjin reacts with confusion when he understands that he is spoken to “Oh, no thanks. Dowoon wants to hear you, not me”

“I think we sound better together. Dowoon probably thinks so too. Don’t you Dowoon-ah ?”

“Yes !” The kid nods vigorously “Sungjinie’s voice is so wow and crispy. I wanna hear you both”

“Raspy, baby, not crispy.” Haeson remarks to her youngest son with a smile and turns her gaze to her oldest and his friend.

“Let’s go then” Younghyun winks at Sungjin before strumming the chords of a random song they both love and know by heart, convincing the older to let go and sing along. He does so and Dowoon face lights up hearing their voices.

That’s all Sungjin can care about ; the cute smile on his brother's lips each time he shows him what his passion is. There is nothing better than this feeling of pride and fondness for Sungjin.

Their mothers suggest songs after songs until Dowoon starts yawning and closes his eyes, slowly falling asleep on his brother's lap.

“We should stop here,” Sungjin says and Younghyun agrees with a nod, ready to put his guitar in its case.

A tired tiny voice interrupts them “No… Pwease, just one more song…” Dowoon mutters, eyes still closed and thumb in the mouth.

“Come on, Dowoon… We already sang you five songs and you’re falling asleep. We’re gonna stop here” Sungjin tries to sound firm but his voice is soft.

“Sungjin-ah, you’re being a little hypocritical here, don’t you think ?” Youngmi asks with a smirk, confusing Sungjin with the sudden accusation, “You once were the same… Let him appreciate the moment”

What is she saying ?

Meeting Younghyun’s gaze which tells him _‘You exactly know what she means’_ , he gives in.

Sure, he once was the same - even worst -as Dowoon, insisting all day long for someone to play more and more music for his own enjoyment.

* * *

_“Can you please play one more song, ahjussi ?” 8 years old’s Sungjin asks Younghyun’s father with puppy-like eyes on one of these summer days they love to spend at the National Park._

_“Sungjin…” Haeson let a sigh out “Don’t you think Hyunseok played enough songs for today ? It’s almost time to go home, love”_

_“But…” Sungjin starts, ready to bring his softest eyes at any moment “I just love his voice very much… And the guitar… It’s such a cool object !”_

_“Daddy is a cool man !” Younghyun, who was almost falling asleep to his father’s music five minutes ago, suddenly exclaims “Best music man ever !”_

_Hyunseok chuckles and looks fondly at his son “Musician, not music man, Hyunie” he then raises his head and tells Haeson “One more song won't kill anyone, will it ?”_

_“I guess it won’t” the woman rolls her eyes with fake exasperation and turns to her best friend “What can I do ? Your husband is as stubborn as his son… And as stubborn as mine”_

_Youngmi laughs “And it’s just the beginning… Imagine those two stubborn children as adults”_

_“They’re eight, Youngmi… You’re projecting yourself way too far. I get chills just thinking about it” Haeson says watching her friend’s husband gigging a last song to the two excited little boys._

* * *

Finally, Youngmi was right. Both Younghyun and Sungjin became even more stubborn and determined than before, especially with pursuing their dreams. The biggest one they have in common being music. And, Sungjin has to admit, it’s all thanks to Hyunseok. An admirable man who was living his passion to the fullest.

“Hyung !” Younghyun calls him out when they’re about to partway on the park’s parking, taking him out of his thoughts

“Do you want to spend the night at mine ?” Sungjin blinks several times, taken aback by the sudden invitation and when his friend sees the frustration on his face, he adds “Wonpil is coming tonight, we’re having a little sleepover. I was wondering if you wanted to come too”

“A sleepover, Younghyun ?” Sungjin mocks him, getting a grip on himself “What are we ? Fifteen years old’s girls in need of gossips ?”

“Park Sungjin, are you really generating a word that basically just means ‘a chillax night with fellas’ to my face ?” Younghyun fakes offense, “I thought better of you… If you don’t wanna come, just say it. No need to be this rude”

Sungjin snorts at that, “Sorry for my rudeness then. I’m down for it. Let me just go back with them--” he nods toward his family settling in the car, “to pick up some stuff and I’ll be there within one hour”

The spontaneous night at Younghyun's is fun.

Yougmi is home but she let them enjoy their time in the house by being really discreet and staying in her room most of the time. She must be used to Wonpil coming over.

Right now, they are sitting on Younghyun’s room cold floor, beer in hands, telling each other various stories, from the scariest to the funniest ones by way of useless ones. Finally, Sungjin’s joke about them being fifteen-year-old girls wasn’t that much of a joke.

Strangely, he really likes it. Laughing, gossiping, singing, playing instruments, and dancing ridiculously to trending K-pop songs without a single worry are things he is usually comfortable doing only with Jae. 

Talking about the lanky blond, Wonpil – in a burst of what we call the confidence of someone who can’t hold his liquor very long – decides to video call him at 11 PM, when Sungjin is answering a text from him.

Jae is confused at first, but he finds the situation quite funny and that’s how he starts to know a little more about the guy Sungjin can’t seem to shut up about for days (aka Kang Younghyun) and his drunk best friend (aka Kim Wonpil). The latter is strangely the one to take the lead in the conversation, surprising Sungjin, who until now only knew him as an extremely introverted and shy guy. He also told Jae so, but look at their first interaction ; Wonpil is extremely talkative and Younghyun is quite calm for once, listening to the whole exchange silently with a fond smile, looking over at Sungjin from time to time.

Jae doesn’t seem to care about the silence of his best friend and Younghyun as he’s laughing heartily to every sentence the tipsy guy facing him on the screen is saying and answering all of his questions honestly. Sungjin notices this with attention. It’s rare to see his best friend so comfortable with someone from the very first meeting. 

Eventually, the call comes to an end despite Jae and Wonpil’s will to continue it as the latter suddenly falls asleep in the middle of a sentence.

Younghyun apologizes to Jae for the impromptu call which lasted more than an hour and a half on Wonpil’s behalf. Jae tells him to not worry and that he was delighted to _finally_ meet him. That left an unreadable expression on Younghyun’s face and they hang up on this, Sungjin telling Jae that he’s gonna call him the next day.

The moment which follows is quite awkward. The two awake boys look at each other without a word for at least a good minute. A soft snort coming from Wonpil’s mouth makes them come back to earth.

Younghyun decides to put the good-looking-even-when-drunk-and-asleep guy on his bed with no difficulty and gets a hoodie and sweatpants out of his wardrobe that he throws in his face.

Sungjin looks at him with a big question mark in the eyes.

“He will eventually wake up because he’s too tight in his jeans. I’m a nice guy but I’m not gonna change his clothes. I’ve given enough” Younghyun nonchalantly shrugs, whispering. Sungjin can feel the experience in his voice so he doesn’t push further. “Wanna go on the hill ?”

Sungjin’s eyes light up at the pronunciation of this word and he nods, eyeing Younghyun who opens his window wide.

The younger asks him if he wants something to drink before telling him to go there and that he will join him when he finishes. He goes out of the room, turning the light off for Wonpil.

Sungjin does as he’s told and silently goes out of the room through the window to climb on the infamous hill they like so much. Actually, it just is a little slope with a large rock on it behind the Kang’s house, but their adventurous little-selves loved to call it a hill. Apparently, it remained. In twenty seconds, he’s already on the top of it and he sits on the rock, waiting for Younghyun.

He joins him quickly, handing him a glass of water.

Sungjin thanks him before looking at what he has in his hand and sighs “Yah, Kang. A coffee ? At fucking 1 AM ? I’m not a doctor but I don’t think this amount of caffeine is good for your body.”

“Are you worried about me, Park ?” Younghyun wriggles his eyebrows playfully.

“Maybe I am” Sungjin declares very seriously and it has the merit to shut the younger up.

Everyone knows Sungjin cares but not everyone has the chance to hear Sungjin say it.

Three words and now he’s emotional. That’s who Kang Younghyun is, ladies and gentlemen. His coffee doesn’t even taste good.

He puts it aside and looks at the almost non-existent but so soothing view they have in front of them. The silence is back between them but this time it isn’t awkward at all, they’re just enjoying the calm of the town at night (even if it’s calm 24/7 but anyway).

Younghyun still chooses to end it after some minutes of complete silence “Jae’s a really nice guy”

“He is,” Sungjin says with a smile “I wasn’t expecting him to get along so well with Wonpil”

“Same, I know tipsy Wonpil can be quite bold at times but for him to call and hold a whole one hour and a half conversation with a stranger… That’s a first. He’s gonna regret it a lot in the morning, that’s for sure”

“He doesn’t have to. If Jae wasn’t chill with it, he would have hung up within the first ten minutes”

“Yeah, I guessed that” Younghyun chuckles, remembering Jae’s annoyed expression when he answered the call, probably thinking it was Sungjin only to switch face when he saw Wonpil’s on the screen “But Wonpil will still freak out”

“Yeah… I don’t know him for so long but it sounds so much like a Kim Wonpil thing to do.”

They laugh together and talks a little more about the funny scene that just happened some minutes ago in front of their faces. Sungjin feels good. It reminds him of the time they had there, on this little “hill” as children. Most of those moments were great. The last one was the most heartbreaking.

Now that he thinks of it, they never went back to it since Younghyun came back from Canada. 

* * *

_The atmosphere is heavy as Haeson takes out the keys to her friend’s home and opens the door, letting Younghyun rush to his room._ _She holds back her tears as she tells Sungjin to go see his friend and make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid._

_Just hearing that makes Sungjin’s whole body shake out of anxiety and sadness but he tries to control his feelings. He cried enough for the day. Right now, Younghyun is in a much worse state._

_See, today is Younghyun’s 12 birthday but probably the worst day of his short life. Rather than spending it happily with his parents and friends, he just spent it mourning his father._

_Haeson had received a call two days before when she was watching a show on the TV with Sungjin. Thirty seconds onto the call and he saw his mother's whole body trembling with shock and almost fainting on the couch. He’s young but not dumb, his mother never cried that much, even after her divorce from his father. The person at the end of the line must have told her something terrible._

_He mechanically started crying too, not wanting his mother to cry that much, for whatever reason it was._

_It turns out that Hyunseok suddenly died in a traffic accident. He was driving a scooter and wasn’t the one at fault. Wrong place at the wrong time. A simple mistake of inattention from a stranger had just destroyed the life of an entire family._

_Sungjin and Haeson had to urgently go to her childhood town for the funeral which so happened to be the day of Younghyun’s birthday. Today, for the first time in his life, Sungjin experienced what grief is._

_Never in his life did he witness his mother be this sad. Never in his life had he seen so many tears streams down Youngmi’s face. Never in his life had he seen such an empty expression on his friend's face. And, never in his life had he felt that sick himself._

_Hyunseok was a big-hearted person. A passionate man. Always there for those and what he loved. His son, his wife, his friends, music. He never committed any sin, never showed when things were not going well, always had a huge smile on his face, so why ? Why had life decided to take over him, such a wonderful person, when there were still a lot of bad people who could still enjoy the beauty of the world ? Sungjin can’t understand. Life is so unfair._

_Unfair to the late man but unfair to those he left behind as well. Youngmi lost her husband. Younghyun doesn’t have a father anymore._

_The widow just told her best friend and Sungjin to accompany Younghyun home and to stay the night with him while she was going to stay in the burial room of her husband for the night. Younghyun had made a scene (it was the first time Sungjin saw him this devastated and angry), not wanting to leave his father, but Youngmi had been firm. The day had already been excruciating for a 12-year-old who had just lost his father, so there was no way he would spend the night in that sickening room._

_So, here Sungjin is, in front of Younghyun’s room door the other boy just slammed, knocking anxiously. He doesn’t receive any answer so he decides to enter after the third time he knocks. He sighs in relief when he does it without difficulty. Younghyun didn’t lock his door._

_But, when he comes into the room, the birthday boy is nowhere to be found. Sungjin doesn’t panic as he exactly knows where he is._

_The window of the room is wide open and he can see his friend’s silhouette on the hill. The boy is curled up, his knees brought to his chest and his head in his arms. Sungjin can hear his weak sobs and this is heartbreaking to witness._

_He slowly climbs the little hill and sits down by his side._

_More than the sobbing, the little boy is also shaking, and this is not only because of the emotion. It’s the middle of December, they are sitting in the freaking snow and Younghyun is just wearing a shirt. Sungjin, who didn’t have the time to take off his warm clothes when they arrived, just put his scarf around Younghyun’s neck silently._

_He has no idea how to comfort him, he’s – they’re – too young to deal with this kind of event._

_He chooses to pat his friend’s back without a word and let some tears out as well. “H-Hyung…”_

_Sungjin is surprised to hear his friend’s voice after five minutes spent in complete silence but manages to answer “Ye—Yes, Younghyun ?”_

_Younghyun raises his head and looks at him with swollen eyes “I’m… What am I gonna do without him ?” he stutters, lips trembling and red because he bit them so much._

_“I don’t know, Younghyun. I’m sorry.” Sungjin honestly answers, eyes shining. “I’m sorry I don’t have any answer to give you, but… I’m here. Mom told me to be here for you, to show you that I care if I do. And I do. So… you can lean on me and cry. Or scream. You can even hit me if you want. Mom didn’t tell me to say that one but I decided that you can. You’re sad and you have to let it all out”_

_Younghyun only cries harder at that and put his head on Sungjin’s shoulder._

_Sungjin cries with him and mechanically takes him in his arms. Being the kind of boy to be already annoyed by hugs at twelve, his mother had told him that they were the best comforting gestures. Right now, Younghyun needed comfort, so he could let his dislike for skinship aside for a few minutes._

_That night, they fell asleep on the hill and the next day, they learned that this was probably the last moment they would have spent there for a long time._

_Youngmi returned home, announcing to her son and the Park’s that they would be moving to Canada for an indefinite period of time. Canada was Hyunseok's favorite vacation destination and he dreamed of living there one day._

_That plus all the memories that this town held convinced Youngmi that they needed some time away._


End file.
